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Cats Herding Humans • 2017 rpg

Keith J. Schnelle •

In Cats Herding Humans, humans are playthings, companions, and caretakers. Mostly playthings.  Frustratingly, they are sometimes needed for opening things and vanquishing enemies.

Ma Wirth’s Boarding House and Cat Sanctuary is a hub of activity. Cats and humans are constantly taken in and adopted out (or whatever happens to humans). Sometimes, when humans leave, cats leave with them. Other cats stay and serve the House Cat Council.

Cats have six skills: Adorableness, Caterwauling, Mauling, Parkour, Sneaking, and Tracking (covers scent marking). Each skill uses a die. Starting skills use d20. As skills improve, they move through d12, d10, d8, d6, and d4 (best). When making an action, choose an appropriate skill and roll the corresponding die. The closer to the die’s middle numbers, the more successful the action. When making actions using multiple skills (Such as Adorableness and Caterwauling to beg), check for each skill individually when determining results. Remember, cats don’t fail so much as change their minds.

Starting cats select 5 skill improvements. Improve 1 skill after each successful game.

Possible plot hooks for the GM:
Drive off the obnoxious human
Refill the food
Find a fabled toy
Stop the invasion from beyond time
Breach the attic

Author Comments

I have tried to hint, in my suggested plot hooks, that this game does not need to be the mundane, day-to-day activities of a normal cat. Feel free to stretch into weird tales or sci fi. More serious crowds can use the mundane or the supernatural to create a game of gritty survival horror.

Special thanks to: Kit Anderson Devon Chandler Anna Holiday Fargo Holiday Cindi Lou Kunkle Kelly Power and Vesuvius (my cat).

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